Confessions of an Insecure Snowwoman

I have a confession to make!
I did not make that oh so important phone call to VW today!
At about 9 am this morning my friend Elisabeth called and asked if I was free to take the kids skiing and snowboarding today. My oldest wants to learn how to Snowboard and Elisabeth is quite a good snowboarder, so I asked her if she could teach my daughter.
This is where we went:
(To txdave: See, a picture! :-) I am not sure on the font style and colours. I want to keep it simple, not too busy. Thanks for your advice though.)
Don't ask about the strange Snowman I have no idea why it is there, although there are a lot of ski courses being held at this ski lift, mainly for young children. (This is a live Webcam image so it of course changes eg. now there is almost no snow and no snowman...)

My younger one who is on ski's (for four years now) went up and down and up and down and up and down like the energizer bunny.
25 times in the space of the five hours we were there. And she had time for making friends, mooching food of some other family (even though we did have plenty), skiing into a tree and taking about 10 lunch breaks!
The older on the other hand went up the lift eight times. Well mainly due to the fact that she had to learn how to sit, how to get up, how to walk, how to turn, how to fall, how to break, how to do curves, how not to run over people, specifically small children and finally how to board down a hill without falling more than three times! She did good though.
I was mainly sitting there, guarding our table and our food and getting very, very cold. Even though I have a brand new snow suit and my feet were definitely warm, when one gets cold hands (as I lent my gloves to Elisabeth because hers had a huge hole) one gets cold everywhere.
I had a cup of mulled wine, two cups of tea and a cup of tomato soup and I was still cold.
You see I am not allowed to ski because of my medical conditions. Not that I can actually ski. But I would like to learn one day. Maybe. So whenever I take the kids out, (and I don't mean "out" out, though they do drive my crazy sometimes - hence the blog name) I tend to have to sit around and wait. Where we used to live, we had a ski lift just outside our back garden so it was never a problem but now I live in a tiny little village that doesn't have anything and I have to drive them everywhere. Not the ideal thing but I had to find somewhere cheap, fast when we moved back here in February last year.
This evening I had a couple of friends turn up (about half an hour after we came home).
I put them to work (helping me cook dinner), fed them and kicked them back out.
One thing the cold does to you, is that it makes you very, very tired.
I hardly ever turn anyone out. People know that they can turn up on my doorstep at any time and if I am at home, they are always welcome (apart from when Simon is here for the weekend). But tonight I just did not feel like having company. Rare, but it happens.

I discovered something called the Nohari or the Johari Window on a different blog today. Oh boy! It is nice to know the nice things people think of you but bad things? Ouch! Hm. Well it's my own fault for posting it. I wish they had an explain function though, so that people could tell you why they think what they think of you. (In case you don't have a clue of what I am talking about, here are the links: The positive version http://kevan.org/johari and the negative version of the site http://kevan.org/nohari )
I think if there is one major fault with me (and Simon says that as well) it is that I take everything way to personal. I always think people are out to get me, people are speaking ill of me or people just downright hate me. Which comes down to the one point all the people that have picked out my "bad habits" on the Nohari page have agreed upon: Insecurity!
Why I am so insecure I haven't actually figured out yet.
So on that note I will leave you (and me) to ponder and go to bed!
Good night!